I was hurt by my therapist and I'm never going back. How do I trust someone to help me again?

This post will be broken into multiple parts.

In addition to my work with clients, I'm a member of two PTSD and trauma groups on Facebook. The most heart breaking posts are the ones involving negligent and unethical behavior from a mental health professional. Every time I read a post like this I feel a knife wounding my soul and this issue is one of the main reasons I have committed myself to being the best professional I can be. I'm crazy passionate about serving others and providing my clients with the most effective solutions out there.

If you have experienced something traumatic, you probably have an extremely difficult time asking for help in the first place. Before we get into this post I want to acknowledge you for being courageous and asking for help. Even if it turned out badly, it was still an act of bravery and every day acts of bravery count. My goal for this series of posts is to help you understand why things went wrong so you find the courage to try again with someone new.

Why therapists sometimes say or do the wrong thing

1. They want to "fix" you

When I first began my journey as a body worker I was obsessed with doing every thing "right" so I could "fix" my broken clients. I felt a wave of terror every time I met a new client because I was afraid to fail. This may not seem that bad (at least it sounds like I cared, right?) the problem was, I was making the sessions about me. I wanted to look like a perfect professional. This made staying present with the client and facilitating healing impossible.

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I made the sessions about me looking perfect rather than staying present with the client.

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I still have high standards for my work and I'm constantly educating myself on the newest science so I can give my clients the best care possible, however, I am no longer concerned with looking perfect. Every session, every client, and every healing journey is different. It may get a little messy or take longer than expected. There may be set backs, road blocks, or back slides, but that is ok. We are on this journey together. Your progress is what's important.

If it's becoming apparent your therapist is becoming frustrated, impatient, or trying to "pull" you toward some imaginary finish line they may be attached to fixing you quickly rather than guiding you toward solutions and honoring your journey. Yes your health professional should get you out of your comfort zone but they should never push you, bully you, or rush you through the process.

Stay tuned for the next installment of this post and let me know if you have ever experienced this type of behavior in the comments below. People need to know that this behavior is not ok and that committed and effective professionals do exist out there.

I'm here for you for you journey back to wholeness.

Much love and many blessings,

Meagan