I was hurt by my therapist and I'm never going back. Part 2
- Meagan Hammer
- Mar 14, 2020
- 2 min read
Reasons Why Therapists Sometimes Do or Say the Wrong Thing
They aren't perfect It's true. Just because we are educated professionals doesn't mean we get it right all the time. Sometimes we just don't know how to handle a situation you have brought to us or maybe we are having an off day. Don't get me wrong, this is not excuse to continue poor behavior. If your therapist has made a mistake, an apology and steps to make amends need to be taken. If you have addressed the situation and this hasn't happened, it may be time move on. However, please don't be in a hurry to fire your therapist.
Don't rush into firing your therapist. This could be a valuable learning opportunity for you.
Many people find enforcing boundaries challenging. If trauma has occurred involving boundaries (and all trauma involves some sort of breach of boundaries) enforcing them can feel excruciating. All good relationships involve healthy boundaries so relearning how to enforce them is not only important for your healing journey but also having long term healthy interactions with others. If your therapist has taken a misstep, this could be a great way to practice having a conversation with someone who is safe and is committed to supporting you. It could be as simple as "I'm concerned about what you just said. Can we talk about it?" Or "That's not helpful. What would be more helpful is ___."
There is no perfect formula, what's important is that you speak up with love.
While it may feel easier to simply leave or brush off the boundary violation, addressing the situation is a small act of bravery that has a larger, long term impact.
**Please note that this post addresses manageable conflicts and mistakes only. There are several behaviors that are serious and dangerous that may require you to end the therapeutic relationship immediately. I'll be talking about what these are in the next post. **
I'm here for you on your journey back to wholeness.
Much love and many blessings,
Meagan
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